Panel Round Two

Jun 28, 2013
Copyright 2018 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ-Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT...DON'T TELL ME! the NPR News quiz. I'm legendary anchorman Bill Kurtis, filling in for Carl Kasell.

(APPLAUSE)

KURTIS: We're playing this week with Brian Babylon, Kyrie O'Connor, and Mo Rocca. And here again your host, at Powell Hall in St. Louis, Missouri, Peter Sagal.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, Bill.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: In just a minute, Bill builds a rhyme machine out of a Delorean. It's our Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-Wait-Wait. That's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Mo, TV producers in Norway are all pursuing a new trend in Norwegian television programming. They now know the only way to make a show there a hit is to make it what?

MO ROCCA: Well, they were the place that had that popular show with the Yule log basically with the fire.

SAGAL: Right. So therefore they've discovered that the new trend in Norwegian television is shows that are really what?

ROCCA: That are long.

SAGAL: And?

KYRIE O'CONNOR: And boring.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Boring is what we're looking for. It's a new thing in Norwegian TV. A few months ago, as Mo said, millions of Norwegians feverishly tuned into a 12-hour TV show featuring wood burning in a fireplace.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Seriously, we talked about it on this show. But it turns out that show was such a runaway success other shows have followed its lead. For example, a seven-hour broadcast of a train traveling from Oslo to Bergen, a 134-hour broadcast of a ferry boat making its way up the Norwegian coastline. Half the country watched that.

BRIAN BABYLON: That's drugs.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Yeah. Well, this does answer the question, is the nation of Norway high? Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: Well, you know what, we have a version of that here in the States. It's called C-SPAN.

SAGAL: Exactly.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Brian, the TV show "Portlandia," as you may know, is a bizarre surreal comedy shows about the hipsters. People like it.

(APPLAUSE)

BABYLON: The hipsters of Portland, Oregon. It's not just for entertainment. It's now being used to do what?

Well, OK. Give me a slight push, hint.

SAGAL: An assist.

BABYLON: An assist, yeah.

SAGAL: They want people to - apparently they want people to follow the example of special agents Armison and Brownstein.

BABYLON: Oh, they have this video to help people make the city better.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: I can tell that Mo wants to answer. Shall I let Mo answer?

BABYLON: Damn.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Go ahead, Mo.

BABYLON: Yeah.

ROCCA: They're using it to train police officers.

SAGAL: So close.

ROCCA: The police officers are using it for things to make people safe.

SAGAL: They're using it to train FBI agents.

ROCCA: OK.

SAGAL: But I'll give you that, police officers, FBI agents.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: An FBI instructor contacted the "Portlandia" producers and requested to use a clip from the show in his terrorism and espionage class.

BABYLON: Yeah, what case can you get...

SAGAL: Well, we don't know.

BABYLON: Like I've seen pretty much every episode. What criminal is doing anything...

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: I don't get it.

O'CONNOR: Well, if you found a criminal with a bird on it...

BABYLON: You're right, you're right.

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: Well, you're right.

SAGAL: So we don't know why this guy wants to do this because he didn't explain. Either he's taking a really outside-the-box approach to teaching counterterrorism or he's a substitute teacher and he's doing what all substitutes do and he's just showing the kids a video.

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: So, hold on, Peter. Let me get this straight.

(APPLAUSE)

BABYLON: Let me get this straight.

SAGAL: Right.

BABYLON: The sequester didn't stop this one?

SAGAL: No, no, no. This goes on, man.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Mo, the new Mercedes S Class sedan, that's the ultra luxury model, goes for six figures. It has a feature Rolls Royces and Bentleys just don't have. With the touch of a button inside your Mercedes S Class you can now do what?

ROCCA: You can - oh, my gosh. With the touch of a button you can do something that can't be done in a Rolls Royce or in a Bentley.

SAGAL: Or any other car, frankly.

BABYLON: You can put a bird on it.

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: You can do - I'll take my clue now.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Hey, was that you or my $100,000 car?

ROCCA: Oh, it - what it does is it instantly sucks away flatulence.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No. You're on the right track.

ROCCA: It immediately takes bad odors and it sprays something nice that neutralizes them.

SAGAL: You're close enough. What it does is you can select the odor you want in your car.

ROCCA: OK.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: There you are. So it's for the person...

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: It's for the person who's rich and powerful and yet is frustrated that the very air will not yet bend to his will.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Get this, Mercedes will provide you in your car an aerosol dispenser with four custom-made scents right for any occasion. There's sports, that's the name of the scent, if you're going to a sporting event or you're purchasing another NFL franchise.

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: Well, so - and I'm guessing most just wanted to smell like money.

SAGAL: Yeah.

ROCCA: There must be like a button for that. But that sounds - it's a way also for guys probably to cover their tracks. Like if you're with a mistress or something, then you can press a button to make the car smell like your wife. So that when she gets in...

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: Because you know what?

SAGAL: Oh, I see what you mean.

ROCCA: Yeah.

BABYLON: Women know scents. They - that's where Mo - because a woman would know, like who's been in this car just immediately.

SAGAL: Really?

BABYLON: Yes, bloodhound. And they have bloodhound DNA.

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: I read that.

ROCCA: And this is precisely why guys should only marry each other.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.